Ladies and gentlemen I would like to welcome you to Trina airlines flight 6969. With non-stop service to pure EXXXtacy.
At this time I'd like your full attention as I tell you the safety features of this ride.
When the seat belt sign is illuminated you must strap up.
There are several emergency exits located on Trina located in the face section, kitty sections and rear sections should explosion occur.
In the event of decompression an oxygen mask will not drop from the compartment above your seat. Trina will re-compress you!!!
To start the flow of blood again she will place her mouth firmly around you and blow.
At which point it will be in your best interest to sit back and try to breathe normally.
Life jackets are located in a various locations. When you are ready to use one notify Trina immediately, or slip it over your crown, and firmly roll down.
Tampering with, dislocating or removing the smoke detectors is prohibited by law. However setting the alarm off from pure bliss is authorized.
I wish you an enjoyable flight!!
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